


Far From My Arms

by to-pick-ourselves-up (Angela007)



Series: The Marks of Running Ink [4]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Blood, Death, F/M, Friendship, Lies, PTSD, Violence, implicit suicide thoughts, mentions of obsessive behaviour
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-04-23 16:02:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14336040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angela007/pseuds/to-pick-ourselves-up
Summary: Is not easy, having a soulmate. Is not easy, to live in the end of the world. Vera would know, she has been doing both things for a while.





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> I promised this sidestory a long while ago. It was supposed to be a one-shot and now it is a drabble trilogy. You might see some familiar names, I got permission from my amazing friend jdntwritesthings to use some of those names and their story from her work Why I Love.

* * *

**_Before_ **

**_Vancouver, WA_ **

Chase Owens was six when he skinned his left knee after falling from the swing back in his family’s backyard.

He had cried all the way to the house’s backdoor and cried a bit more when his mom took him upstairs to shower off the dirt.

While his mom went to get him some clean clothes, Chase showered, wincing a bit every time soap touched his sensitive, tiny wound. At six, Chase didn’t really care, nor did he notice the neat letters that appeared over his burning flesh.

 

**_Vera L. Osborne._ **

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_Before_ **

**_Marietta, GA_ **

Vera Louise Osborne liked visiting her aunt and uncle, they were kind and she loved her cousins to death. Addison and Madeline were sweet and fun to be around. Madeline endured Vera and Addison’s excessive attention whenever Vera visited. They did so many things together, shopping, baking, reading, swimming, giggle like crazy, but their mission was clear.

“Taking care of you is our thing, Maddie.” Addison would say.

This summer, however, things were simply wrong.

Vera noticed the frazzled looks Addison’s parents exchanged every other minute when they thought the girls wouldn’t catch them.

Addison wouldn’t say much, but Vera noticed the stiff way in which she now carried herself, taking care of Madeline almost obsessively.

She would have never imagined the way they had to run from the city, leaving their family behind, escaping with nothing but their life and clothes on their backs.

The crowds were enormous and they just didn’t know what to do. People dropped dead and then reanimated to eat their loved ones and bite everything in their way.

Then…then the worst thing happened.

Vera lost them.

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_Before_ **

**_Columbus, OH_ **

Chase Owens was the star of his college football team when the world went to shit.

He was about to get a fucking contract with the Seattle Seahawks.

_The damned Seattle Seahawks._

Then corpses started walking and everything had gone to hell.

Campus had become chaos and one day, a guy walked up to him in a blood-stained suit with a machete in one hand and a gun in the other.

“Place is about to be overrun, gotta move out, pretty boy.” The man had warned him.

Chase had taken the sensibly packed survival bag he had prepared weeks ahead of this event and followed the man.

It was three days into their walk that Chase asked for his name.

“Lucas Emilio Fernandez.” The man answered, a smirk tugging at his lips. “I don’t need to ask for yours, though, champion boy.”

“No, I don’t think you do.” Chase laughed. And once he started, he found it difficult to stop until tears ran down his cheeks. He didn’t know shit.

His mother and sister were supposed to be back home, but home was the other side of the country, a world away from him.

Chase Owens received the pain of his soulmarks with joy.

 

**_I lost them._ **

 

Worry gripped his heart and that night, he prayed whoever was his soulmate found what they were looking for.

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_After_ **

**_Unknown_ **

Vera had felt hungry once or twice in her life. Hungry in the sense of being able to calm her belly with a snack or a drink before real food made its way to her stomach.

Hunger pains were the worst thing that had happened to her, listed right under the end of the world and losing Addison and Madeline.

She was tucked away inside a closet, in the second floor of a little house in some suburb, feeling so much pain she could barely move. She was clutching a knife in her hands, with as much strength as she could muster.

Vera didn’t know how close she was to dying, but she felt that she was on the very edge of it. Gone was the healthy girl from months before, she was emaciated and pale, looking more like one of the dead with every passing day. The young woman knew she was still sane because she was worried for her sanity, after not talking to anyone for months on end.

Today was bad, but also good.

The extreme cold weighed on her for long hours. Vera was always cold now, even warmly dressed and inside the full closet, she was shivering, and her body was unable to produce anymore heat.

Her hand stung and Vera whimpered as she took off the thick woolen glove she’d found inside one of the drawers so she could read the words in the inside of her left palm.

 

**_There’s still hope, buddy_.**

 

For a moment, her heart ached with longing and despair as the realization hit her.

Vera felt hopeless.

For days, she had wondered if the hunger would finally defeat her. In her darkest moments, Vera thought of simply stepping out of her hiding place to scream her lungs out until the dead came for her.

She’d tried to do it twice, but her hand always shook uncontrollably over the door handle. Those were the really bad days, she thought.

Before today.

Vera didn’t think she could even scream and her pride didn’t let her burden her soulmate with pointless requests of help.

What could they do, wherever they were at?

“I’m sorry.”

Dizziness made her head swim and…

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_After_ **

**_Greenbrier, WV_ **

Ben Barnes knew his men were tired.

They had walked in the snow for more than two days, it was their new routine after realizing such stunting cold made the walkers slow down even more than they were already. The little street they chose to make camp was made up of two rows of pretty houses that had seen better days.

Scouting was out of the question in the oncoming blizzard, but he knew what to do. Houses with open doors could mean walkers and they for sure meant abandoned buildings. A house with closed doors meant either inhabitants or people who had escaped carefully.

“Ben.” Tyson called and the lieutenant turned to look at him. “There.”

One of the houses was mostly intact, and there were details to it, it looked slightly cared for, even with its covered windows.

Ben called for them to stop and some tired groans reached his cold ears, but the group gathered around him. Tyson and Tyler were the only ones left from the original troop, the others were strays he had picked up in the way.

“What’s up?” Lucas asked, a hopeful look taking over the man’s face.

“We’re staying here tonight.” Ben said, pointing at the kept house.

The group’s heads turned to the house and then back to him.

“We aren’t killing anyone unless we have to. Tyson will stay here with Tyler, Chase and Ross.” The men nodded. “Lucas, you come with me.” The man nodded as well. “You guys come inside if none of us comes back in five.”

Tyson set the clock and Lucas followed Ben inside.

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •

The house was clean, almost too clean, bordering on immaculate, and it was horrifyingly eerie.

“This is weird, dude.” Lucas whispered, a bit too loud, making Ben shiver.

They heard the shrill creaking of a door opening and then a soft thud overhead, and Ben ordered Lucas to follow him upstairs.

Room by room they discovered the too clean places. It was even weirder to see the old blood stains had been left and everything had been put back in place and tidiedto exhaustion.

“Barnes.”

Ben turned around to look at Lucas, who was suddenly pale and serious.

_Bad._ His mind warned as he walked towards Lucas, who was standing, almost frozen at the threshold.

And he saw the long, mated hair and the pale skin, tight over bones, all under a bunch of seemingly warms clothes. They both stepped in the room and the bundle groaned quietly.

Lucas readied his gun and Ben his knife.

The silence was only interrupted by their breathing.

Then a shuddering breath and a sob.

Ben knelt and bent to uncover whoever - _whatever?_ \- was under the cloaks and coats.

A girl.

“She’s alive!” He exclaimed in shock.

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Vera woke up to warmth.

The toasty air felt heavenly over her dry skin and she could hear the cracking of a chimney. The room smelled of food and she thought she was imagining things.

Had she died and actually gone to heaven?

It was possible.

Then the pain dashed her hope.

All of her body was hurting.

“Don’t move, you’re too weak.” A soft voice commanded. Vera opened her eyes, she needed to see whoever had that majestic voice, the first one not coming from the inside her head in months. “You’re safe.”

Kind blue eyes found hers and Vera noticed how she couldn’t be imagining things. Someone had gotten her out of the closet and created a big, burning fire in the chimney of the house she’d found and taken over months ago. 

Had it been him?

She tried to ask but a raspy, ugly sound emerged from her throat instead of words and the man smiled.

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Chase took her hand in his, trying to soothe her crying.

She was so cold.

Ben wasn’t sure she would live, but Chase hoped she would. Her sobs almost broke his heart and he wished…he really wished he could tell her about the words he had seen, etched in the palm of her hand.

He wished he could tell her that he wouldn’t take the apology she had given him, because there was nothing to forgive. Alas, he could not. The shock could be her undoing and he wasn’t willing to risk it, so, Chase lifted the girl carefully in his arms and cradled her to his chest.

“You’re okay, you’re safe. I promise. I’ll keep you safe.”

The sobs stopped minutes later and Chase held his breath until he noticed her chest raising and falling.

He’d keep his soulmate safe, even if it was the last thing he did.

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •


	2. Part II

• •    • • •     • • •     • • • • • •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_After_ **

**_Greenbrier County, WV_ **

Vera sat under the shade of the oak tree in the backyard of the house. She had welcomed the late arrival of the spring after that first, grey and bitter winter.

She tried to ignore the heavy gaze directed at her from inside the house. The sun was nice and warm and the breeze smelled clean. There wasn’t even a trace of the nauseatingly sweet smell of rotting flesh.

The mixed group of men that had arrived at her home the previous December had saved her life in every sense.

Vera knew that her health was very frail now, the air made for anasty cold and coughs that lasted weeks. She saw things or heard voices she knew weren’t there and her body was still making up for the loss of muscle mass.

Dying was faster than healing - _at least it seemed like it to her._ Her body refused to respond to her at times, and some others, her mind played tricks on her. Vera hated the feeling of helplessness. Where she had been tenacious enough to survive alone for more than a year. She was now uninterested in keeping herself afloat.

And that’s how one of her present predicaments came to light, and his name was Chase Owens.

The former football player - _he was fond of his past life and talking about it_ \- was like his own ray of sunshine. It helped that he was so definitely easy on the eye, and that he doted on Vera every minute he could dedicate to her. Vera had a difficult time to accept it at first, when she had been too weak to stay awake for more than a few hours a day, but Chase helped keep the voices inside her head quiet, and ultimately silenced most of the time. She had less incidents with those as time passed, and for that, Vera knew she would always be grateful to him.    

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

“I’m worried about Tyler.” Ben said one night, when he and Chase were on guard together. Double guards weren’t needed anymore, if they were completely honest; however, company always helped during night watch.

“Worried how?” Chase asked, frowning slightly.

Ben sighed and threw a look around them to check for listeners to their conversation.

“I’ve seen him looking at Vee.” The lieutenant confessed. “And I don’t like the way he looks at her.

A cold feeling settled in Chase’s stomach at Ben’s words. Ben Barnes was an observant man, if Chase knew one. The fierce lieutenant had taken an unusual liking to Vera, as if she were his younger sibling, and the man made sure to tell Vera about this girl he had known - _who he wasn’t sure was still alive_ -, and that she reminded him off. To Ben, that girl had been like a sister, and Vera seemed to like the idea of adopting another sibling to her single fold family.

As such, Ben’s observation brought the strange, aloof attitude the soldier displayed since they had arrived made into focus. It made sense, it was a power move.

“What do you mean?” the ex-footballer asked anyway, wanting to know if it was only his paranoia after all, or if there was something deeper behind Ben’s words.

The lieutenant racked his hands through his hair.

“Tyler barely passed the psych entrance tests for the army.” Ben mentioned, trying to remember the words of his own commanding officer when Tyler had been assigned to Ben’s squad, right before the outbreak. “He wasn’t deemed a risk back then, but the dead didn’t walk back then.”

Chase took a sip of his coffee and waited for Ben to continue.

“Tyler looks at Vera like she is… _something_  he wants.” Ben paused. “Like  _prey_.”

“You think we should tell her?” the blond asked.

Ben’s eyes widened comically. “Hell no! She needs stability until she’s completely recovered.”

Even if he didn’t want to admit it, Chase knew Ben was right. Vera was still a bit weak, and the first few weeks after they arrived had been hard. She still had nightmares, tired easily and was wary of them at times. Chase hated when she recoiled away from his touch, when he felt starved for hers; he hadn’t known the effect that finding her would have on him, but finding out was hell. So far, Lucas was the only one who knew about him and Vera. Chase doubted he could keep the secret for long.

It was getting a little bit more difficult to stay away. Every day he kept the secret, Chase felt his heart break anew.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Being the only girl living with the little military squad wasn’t as hard as she had expected and Vera felt protected even if she had a difficult time talking to the new arrivals. She didn’t know them, they didn’t know her and she wasn’t about to go up to them and talk their ears off. She missed Addison dearly and wondered if the rest of her cousins were fine. Addison was strong, so Vera  _hoped_  she survived, even if they never found each other again.  

She also thought that, if this had happened before, when she was still doe eyed and naïve, she wouldn’t have noticed.

But she did.

The guys watched her.

Ben watched over her like an older brother, and he was going up and above to help her gather survival skills. She now knew how to build a fire, how to shoot a gun - _and be good at it_ \- and how to identify some edible plants. Lucas was a good friend, always with a smile in his face and a funny story about his  _abuelita_ or his  _tíos_ , and he always wanted to eat things Vera doubted he could get in the apocalypse. Tyson cared little for anything that wasn’t about keeping them all fed and protected and it was one of the reasons he seemed to spend all his time with Ben. Chase looked at her as if she had hung the moon and the stars and that unnerved Vera a bit, but he was always sweet around her so she accepted his attention with little next to no problem, he was eager for her company and Vera didn’t want to be alone.

Then…there was Tyler.

Tyler watched her in the way Vera imagined a spider watches a fly, waiting for it to be caught in its web. It was almost impossible to avoid him in the close quarters they all kept, but Vera did her best, however unsubtle it was.

She fled any room when they found themselves alone and tried to converse as little as possible with him; Vera had the feeling, a sort of unbidden hunch about Tyler. Her mind simply screamed, pleaded for the brunette to get away from him.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

That’s how  _he_ noticed it.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Vera stepped out of the shower one warm night in May - _she loved army guys and their resistant watches that told the hour, day and year-_ , making sure to dry her hair carefully, to braid it firm and tight, until her next shower.

She put on her pajamas, that were getting to the point of being worn. Not that it mattered, no one ever cared to see her in pajamas.

The distraction of her hair, the towel over her ears and the noise of her own thoughts kept Vera from listening to her surroundings, a basic skill that she thought she’d dominated already. The groaning of the wooden floor and the screeching of the door’s hinges were low enough.

Her eyes noticed the invasion a little bit too late; when the reflection in the mirror was already upon her.

“Don’t move,  _girlie._ ” Tyler’s slightly raspy voice was right beside her ear, making Vera shudder in fear and revulsion.

 _It felt wrong_.

Tyler was behind her, pressing the length of his body against her back. Cold sweat broke in her hands, forehead and back as she kept still, with a knot where her throat was supposed to be.

Years of lessons and defense classes on what to do during and after an attack hadn’t prepared Vera for the cold grip of overwhelming fear. Her throat was closed, her eyes were watering uncontrollably and her body was stiff as a board, as if that would stop the invasive touches and loud, lustful pants coming from behind her.

“You remind me of her.” Tyler panted. “The girl with those pretty eyes, before the horde.” 

_What horde?_

_What girl?_

Vera squeaked in disbelief when Tyler’s arousal became known to her through their clothes, poking her lower back.

“Are you gonna be a good girl for me, Vera?”

Tyler had a hand inside the robe, making its way over her chest, with a rough touch that almost made her gag. Revulsion notwithstanding, Vera nodded, and Tyler rubbed himself harder on her back, while his other hand made a trail up her thigh, bunching her robe up as he went.

“Good, this is going to feel good, I promise.”

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Vera couldn’t even scream.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Ben was mad at Chase because the man had made them go back earlier than planned, and without much to show for their exploration of the closest neighborhoods.

Chase was usually obedient and attentive to orders, it made him a good soldier, if a bit improvised due to the circumstances, but today he couldn’t be controlled. 

Actually, he  _wouldn’t._

The blond went into their home running as if his life depended on it.

“Give him a break.” Lucas suggested, eyeing the house with suspicion at Chase’s weird behavior.

Ben was about to answer when they heard the screams.

“No! Let him go! Stop!” Vera’s frantic voice traveled down the stairs and into their ears with startling clarity. “Tyler, no!”

Something crashed and they could hear the thuds of a scuffle, while Vera kept begging for Tyler to stop.

Without hesitation, Ben pointed his nine-millimeter to Tyler’s head, just as Tyler was about to use a piece of glass to cut Chase down. The click of the gun was almost deafening in the new silence. Chase was badly injured, and Tyler wasn’t that far behind, but Vera seemed apparently unharmed, save for a little cut in her cheek.

“I suggest we all take a deep breath.” Ben commanded coldly. “We’re civilized people.”

Vera’s exhalation became a sob and the young woman fell to the floor, as her knees were unable to keep her upright.

“I’m going to say this once, Tyler, put that down and get away from Owens.” 

Tyler obeyed, putting his hands up in surrender.

“We were having fun, sir.” Tyler inclined his head on Vera’s direction. “Then this one,” he pointed at Chase. “crashed in where he wasn’t invited.”

“You were assaulting her!” Chase exclaimed, wincing in pain and touching his side carefully.

“Shut up both of you!” Ben chastised. “Lucas, take Vera to her room.”

Lifting Vera in his arms, Lucas cleared the hallway as fast as he could, trying to soothe the petite woman as he walked to her room.

Ben wanted to kill Ross and Tyson for not being aware of this. He wanted to slap himself for being so naïve, after he had noticed the predatory way in which Tyler looked at Vera.

“I’m going to talk to Vera, Tyler.” Ben said. “If she contradicts you, I’ll take measures.”

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Chase knew the scene he had watched in the bathroom would haunt him to his dying day.

Vera’s stiff posture and the tortured look in her eyes had told him everything, Tyler had been all over her. Chase didn’t want to know how far the man had gone with his soulmate, if he did, there was a very real possibility he would kill Tyler.

For the time being, at least, they didn’t have to share a space. Ben had decided to keep them isolated from each other and the rest of the house inhabitants, and Lucas had to take their food to them.

It was the reason he was surprised when, in the dead of the night, someone opened the door to his ‘isolation’ room.

Light steps and a sweet, floral fragrance invaded Chase’s senses as he saw Vera under the light of the moon. His lovely soulmate looked almost ethereal as she sat at his side on the bed.

“Thank you.” She whispered, touching his cheek softly with her cool fingers. “Thank you for saving me.”

“I will always try to save you.” Chase blurted awkwardly.

Vera smiled shyly.

“How did you know?”

“I didn’t, I just felt wrong.” He confessed. “I had to do something, I couldn’t let him hurt you.”

Chase didn’t know if it was just him, but something must have given him away, because Vera’s expression lit up in understanding as her lovely brown eyes fell on her left hand.

“Why?” she asked, even though she knew the answer. 

Vera wanted  _him_  to say it.

“Because you are my soulmate.”

• • •    • • •     • • •     • • •  • • •    • • •     • • •     • • •


	3. Part III

• • •  • • •  • •     • • •   • • •    • • •     • • •     • **_• •_**

**_After_ **

**_Lexington, VA_ **

Ben was depressed after they lost Ross to an infection, and surprisingly, Lucas had taken over their little squad’s leadership.

That was how they found themselves going the wrong way, west instead of east. It was how they found an old man who used to be a baker and took him in.

It was how they found the fence adorned with dead ones that clawed at empty air, while people bustled behind the mesh fence.

It was how they were brought to ‘ _the boss’._

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_After_ **

**_The Sanctuary, VA_ **

They had been at The Sanctuary for a couple years when the satellite outpost was finished.

“What?” Vera exclaimed.

Lucas winced and left the room and Chase made a mental note to remember that later.

“Simon wants us there, what can I say, Vee?” he asked his soulmate. Vera was truly fuming.

“So, change places with Lucas.” She suggested.

“I tried already, honey.” Chase pleaded. “Simon won’t hear of it. Tyson and Lucas offered to take my place, but he won’t have it and Negan is too busy right now.”

“Yeah, I know, the school and the mall. **..** ” Vera crossed her arms over her chest. “Can I go?”

“I would prefer if you didn’t just yet.”

Their gazes met and Chase saw the telling shine in Vera’s eyes.

“We haven’t been apart in years, Chase.” Vera’s voice broke halfway through her sentence and he crumbled to her feet on his knees.

Vera held in her sobs.

“I know, honey, but I can’t just say no.” he reasoned. 

Lucas promised Chase he would take care of Vera and so had Tyson. He had been too much a coward to tell his girl that her adopted brother was the one who insisted in Chase leaving the Sanctuary in favor of the outpost. And he couldn’t be mad at Ben; because no matter how misguided the attempt, he was trying to protect Vera, something that Chase himself strived to do.

“I know that.” She admitted.

He thought that, once at the outpost, it would be a lot easier not to miss her.

“Everything’s going to be okay.” Chase promised.

_Damn, was hewrong._

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_The Sanctuary, VA_ **

Vera was sitting on the steps of the emergency staircase of the Sanctuary, her gaze unseeing as she simply existed.

She didn’t hear the steps approaching behind her or noticed the warm body surrounding her. However, Vera felt the comforting touch Lucas was offering her when he put his arm around her shoulders.

It broke her.

It broke her resolve and crumbled her spirit, and she cried, cried, cried.

Lucas cradled her in his arms and cried with her. They stayed outside until it was too cold for comfort.

Vera was too weak to even stand and so, Lucas carried her to the room she used to share with Ben. He desisted in trying to leave her there when she raged, cried and begged Lucas to take her to his room.

He wasn’t sure if that was reasonable, he used to share is room with Chase, but he had no option. Lucas feared that, left alone, Vera would harm herself.

Lucas let her sleep in his bed, but they didn’t really sleep as much as they passed out, too wary and hurt to even think about the next day.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_Satellite Station, VA_ **

It was a quiet night.

Rationally, nothing should have gone wrong, they were having a night like any other, playing cards a bit before they went to bed or to their watching-shift.

Naomi and Ben were sharing a bottle of beer while Chase and Eric prepared the next poker game.

Chase was happy listening to Eric’s never-ending talk about his baby girl.

“Elle says she is doing well, you know, growing strong.” The proud parent in Eric showed in the slight glint of his eyes, it shone through the ever-present sadness of having lost his soulmate. “She looks so much like my Amy.”

_Damn._

Chase clapped Eric’s back with a sympathetic smile and opened his mouth to speak when the alarms went off.

The laugh stopped and everyone took their weapons.

“What the fuck? What the fuck?!” Ben hissed, as soon as the shots started.

Naomi closed the door to the area they were guarding and put a finger over her lips while Eric and Chase grabbed their weapons as well.

The shooting continued for a while, short screams reached the area they were in, the deafening shots silenced the screaming.

There was a short silence and then the shooting came closer.

Naomi prepared her gun, ready to use it as she guarded the door and they tried to scrambled for their own guns. The deafening bang of the shot caught them by surprise as Naomi’s body dropped to the floor, creating a crimson stain on the floor the longer she didn’t move.

Ben pushed Chase and Eric to move to the exit on the back of the room.

A rain of bullets hit them all.

Ben cried out, but Chase couldn’t hear it as he pushed Eric down, trying to protect him using his body as a shield. Eric was gasping in pain, making the effort to breathe. His lips were moving, but Chase’s ears were ringing.

A pair of boots came into Chase’s field of vision and his eyes looked up involuntarily. A big, redheaded man was pointing his gun at Eric’s head.

He saw the spark and felt the blood hit his face.

Chase could hear screaming, he was sure, only it was all inside his head.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_After_ **

**_The Sanctuary, VA_ **

“Why Lucas?!” Vera raged, turning the heads of the working people in the garden.

“I don’t know, Vera, but you have to accept it.” Her friend said, placing his warm hands on her shoulders. It felt wrong, his hands felt light and soft, unlike the steady strength Chase provided.

“Until his marks show in me, I won’t believe he’s gone!”

“Yeah? And what if he didn’t even have a chance to speak?!”

It was too horrible to imagine, but everyone sort of  _knew_.

The people of the outpost had been attacked in the middle of the night, killed in their sleep. Shot, suffocated or stabbed. There had been a scuffle, that was sure. The accounts of the scouting team delivered as much. There had been blood, spent casings and lots of bodies.

Vera felt pain so acute, she lost her breath. “Who dare you?” she wheezed.

“I don’t want you to waste away, okay?! You’re the only family I have left, Vee!”

Hearing the nickname Chase had given her when they first met, Vera crumbled again.

“I can’t believe he is gone. It’s not fair!”

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Chase gasped in pain.

He knew he was losing entirely too much blood. The edges of his vision were becoming blurrier by the second as he made his stumbling way through the woods.

The notion of being lost wasn’t far from his mind, because the moaning of the dead could mean anything, from a closing-in horde to the fence of the Sanctuary.

He hoped it was the later.

Chase wished for one thing and one thing only. He wanted to see Vera’s face again, even if it was for his dying moments. He wanted his last words to be for her, her name, how much he loved her. Oh, Chase knew he could still say it, but it was meaningless if he died in the middle of the goddamned woods, in  _Somewhere_ , Virginia.

The tears running down his face surprised him, because Chase felt dehydrated and spent. He knew he had soiled himself when he’d been shot, he could smell himself too, in the aftermath.

Death in itself wasn’t bad, he came to understand. 

A _slow death_ , however? That was hell, through and through.

Chase continued to stumble and pause for a few minutes, until his eyes caught sight of a bright light ahead of him. The child in him remembered Sunday school and how there was supposed to be light at the end of the tunnel, the cynic in him wanted it to be a clearing, preferably somewhere with water.

He got neither.

Loose gravel made him fall on his face when his arms faltered in keeping him from hitting the ground.

Right before losing consciousness, Chase swore he could see the looming silhouette of the place he called home.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

When he woke up, he was in the infirmary. Doctor Carson had remarked how lucky he had been.

“Another inch to the right and you could have bled out before I got the bullet out, son.”

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Negan wanted to know what happened.

Chase told him what he could remember. He told him about the man who killed Eric.

Negan nodded.

It wasn’t his imagination, Chase reasoned, the rage he had seen in the eyes of his leader when he promised retribution worth the offense.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Tyler had begged forgiveness, and Chase gave it, because he wasn’t out of danger yet and if he died, he wanted no burdens on him. Vera was disapproving, but she said nothing, and Chase’s heart swelled in his chest, full with pride and love for his soulmate.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Lucas found out because he was good pals with Arat and Laura.

It had been bloody.

Eric had been avenged.

So had Elle.  

And then, they were all prohibited to speak about any of them again.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

**_Now_ **

**_The Sanctuary, VA_ **

Chase knew Vera.

Actually, there were only two people he could pride himself in knowing well now.

Lucas and Vera.

He noticed the new way in which Lucas acted after he came back from Alexandria, talking about how great the place was.

“As if the apocalypse hadn’t happened.” He said.

But Lucas wasn’t thinking of running water, renewable energy and state of the art A/C. No, his friend’s mind was on a woman.

Turns out they met said woman before what they anticipated. Vera had taken to Tory Miller with an eager excitement that kept any bad feeling of Chase at bay. Lucas was completely enamoured with the grey eyed girl too, and that was a fight that Chase knew he would lose.

Tory Miller seemed to Chase like a person who knew the value of a secret. She held herself in a secretive and high-strung way that made Chase think of a soldier with PTSD. Ben had been like that too. However, his soulmate’s new friend was quick of wit and easy going enough when she felt comfortable, as they came to understand.

Chase could have kissed her as well when she gave them the wedding bands she carried with her anywhere.

No day in his life was as happy as the day he heard the words  _Mrs. Owens_ leave Negan’s mouth, as he declared him married to Vera.

Things were definitely looking up for them.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Then Tory and Lucas broke up, right after Negan announced they were going to a fucking war.

Chase wanted to scream.

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

Vera was pacing, worried and withdrawn.

Chase knew it had reached peak worry when Vera hadn’t seen Tory in three days and no one had given her a feasible explanation for her friend’s absence.

Vera’s first choice was to resolve the situation with Lucas, but he had come up with a worse idea than hers.

“Tyler’s gone too, Vee. I’m scared.” Lucas informed them with a haunted look in his eyes. “What if he did something to California?”

“I don’t think so.” Vera replied, she turned her eyes to the leader of the Saviors, who was sharing his meal with his many wives at the head table.

He looked calm and composed, either Negan didn’t know what was going on, or he knew and wasn’t telling anyone.

“You know Negan would have done something about that already.” Vera continued.

Lucas grimaced, but Vera rolled her eyes at him; Chase knew she hadn’t really forgiven him for his breakup with Tory, even more after such a messy aftermath.

“What if they just left together?” Chase compromised, earning himself a glare from his wife and his best friend. “Justan idea…”

“No.” Vera shook her head. “Tory wouldn’t go with the man who killed her dad.”

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

As it turned out, Tory hadn’t left the Sanctuary with Tyler.

She’d murdered him.

When Vera told Chase of Martha’s crazy plan he laughed. He laughed so hard he thought he’d bruise his cheeks.

“It’s not going to work.”

Vera had a dead serious look on her face.

“I have to try. Tory did something I wish I had been strong to do.”

Chase felt the lick of shame so acutely he shut his mouth.

“Tell me if you need my help.”

• •    • • •     • • •     • • •

The night after they found out about the twins was perhaps the most peaceful night they’ve ever had. They ignored the risks, the possibilities of something going wrong, the state of the world and the looming threat of the war between communities.

This night belonged to them.

Chase and Vera were laying on their bed quietly, cradling the baby bump that held their babies.

“I’m glad you found me.” Vera said quietly, looking at their joined hands.

Chase gave her a watery smile.

“I’m glad I found you too. I’m grateful for very moment, Vee. For everything.”

Vera smiled at her husband.

“I know.”

Returning her beatific smile Chase finally forgave himself for blurting out that he and Vera were soulmates so long ago. If he was sincere, that was when it all really started for them.

And it was far from over.

• • •   • • •     • • •     • • • • • •    • • •     • • •     • • •


End file.
